Funny Christmas Quotes

Funny Christmas Quotes To Keep You Jolly In This Season

Here you will find collection of Funny Christmas quotes,Hilarious Christmas quotes sayings collection.


Funny Christmas Quotes To Keep You Jolly In This Season


Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.
~ Gary Allan


Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.
~ Andy Borowitz


Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.
~ Johnny Carson


That’s the true spirit of Christmas:
people being helped by people other than me.
~ Jerry Seinfeld


Read More: Santa Claus Quotes


The main reason Santa is so jolly is
because he knows where all the bad girls live.
~ George Carlin


Keep your friends close, your enemies closer,
and receipts for all major purchases.
~ Bridger Winegar


Funny Quotes Sayings For Christmas


What I don’t like about office
Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.
~ Phyllis Diller


Christmas is a state of mind and
that special feeling that only comes with an empty bank account.
~ Melanie White


Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree.
In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall.
~ Larry Wilde


Read More: Christmas Captions Quotes For Instagram


I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas
with a note on it saying, toys not included.
~Bernard Manning


I stopped believing in Santa Clause when I was six.
Mother took me to see him in a department store,
and he asked for my autograph.
~ Shirley Temple


Once again, we come to the Holiday Season,
a deeply religious time that each of us observes,
in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.
~ Dave Barry


There are some people who want to throw their arms round you simply
because it is Christmas; there are other people
who want to strangle you simply because it is Christmas.
~ Robert Staughton Lynd


A lovely thing about Christmas is that it’s compulsory,
like a thunderstorm and we all go through it together.
~ Garrison Keillor

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